Self-delusion is the greatest of all delusions. People come to me with significant issues on a daily basis. Many have life-threatening behaviour. These could range from drug and alcohol addiction to food compulsions and medical problems that are a direct result of their behaviours. Be aware these things can all be solved very easily and often very quickly.
If it is so easy, what’s the issue? The issue is self-delusion. “I don’t have a problem with food,” says the person who is struggling to sit in the clinic chair, morbidly obese, type two diabetic, with dangerously high blood pressure. Unable to see their shoes let alone tie the laces. “I just like food”. Or the best of all “I just don’t know why I’m fat, I eat all the right things.” Or “I have big bones and I have a hormonal issue. Everyone in my family is this way”. No, let’s us face the facts, too much in, not enough out. Now, it is true that there may be other factors involved. However, there is still too much in not enough out.
This conversation could just as easily be had on the subjects of alcohol, drugs, anorexia, depression, anxiety, sexual issues and a whole list of relationship related problems. In a funny sort of way the problem is not the problem, the person’s perceptions are the real issue.
This might sound strange, but when someone with this type of thing walks into the clinic, my primary objective is to discover the secret that they are hiding with the self-destructive behaviour. The very visible condition that they walk in with is never the problem. The condition is the method used to keep the secret.
Discover the secret, and you are well on the way to having the presenting problem disappear. What could the secret be? It is amazing the diversity of secrets that people have. What is more unbelievable is how innocent many of these secrets are. Often the creation of a child’s misunderstanding of the world. It’s mostly just intense feelings attached to a moment in time, long forgotten consciously. As the secret is revealed, the world changes forever. People can then get on with the business of having fun and living.