I am frequently asked to comment on how do you make life work. How do you do life? What is the meaning of life?
Who asks these questions? They are often presented by emotionally exhausted individuals. People who have come to realise that the system, plan or approach they have been applying is not quite working for them. These are questions I have struggled with throughout my entire professional life. I don’t think for a second that I have the complete answer. I’m not even sure there is one.
What I have come to understand, or possibly more accurately accept, is that discipline is the key. Oh God, how many of you just took a deep breath in and looked away for a moment. Did I say the “D” word? You know, the word that is full of drudgery? That, in some circles, the “D” word is worse than the “F” word. Relax everyone. It is not about the discipline of doing the right thing all the time in everything you do. It isn’t even the discipline of being told what to do all the time.
It is about the taking of personal responsibility in the three major areas of life. Get these three sectors sorted and I do know for sure that the quality of your life will change for the better forever. Don’t think for a second that I’m saying it is easy, No it is not. Well, not in the beginning anyway. But in the long term, it is heaven on earth. What are they, and what are these three major areas? Health, Relationships and Wealth. Get a sense of discipline sorted in these three areas of your life and you will never look back.
The vast majority of people have few rituals put in place to maintain these critical sectors of life. At the end of the day, the peak of your happiness will be determined by one of these three which is the least developed. I like to imagine a bucket with three holes in it. The maximum amount that you can carry in the bucket is not determined by the hole closest to the top edge. It will be dictated by the lowest one.
People who specialise in making money at the cost of health lose their wealth fighting to regain their health. The stress of financial issues can be devastating to a relationship. The true irony is that people that are all together on the subject of money believe that more money will solve the problems. Healthy people will insist that more health will address financial issues. Put simply being wealthy and obese, making more money won’t solve the problem. Healthy and broke, going for a 10-kilometre run won’t pay the bills.
Acquiring daily practices in health, relationships and wealth are important. Being healthy improves the quality of your relationships and doing business. Money presents you with the opportunity to have a relationship without financial pressures. Relationships are essential to good health and wealth.
Does it mean that if you get these disciplines in place, you will never have issues again in your life? No. It does mean you will be in the best position to deal with the inevitable twists and turns that life invariably presents. This is what the training in NLP is all about — establishing habits and behaviours at an unconscious level. When we teach life coaching, these are the areas we start with.